If I were to ask you what events or experiences changed your life forever, you might say the death of a loved one; the birth of a baby; a graduation; a milestone birthday; a newscast. A newscast? Most likely you wouldn’t, but I would.
It was in 1992. My husband, Rick, and I turned on the evening news anticipating the weather for the next day. However, the news anchor was in the middle of a story about two foster children who had died while in foster care.
I remember a wave of intense emotion rushing over me–anger, sadness, helplessness. By the end of the two-minute story, I was ready to foster each and every foster child in Missouri’s foster care system at that time—all 13,000 of them! The story concluded with the contact information for the Division of Family Services (DFS) flashing across the screen and an urgent plea for the viewers to get involved.
Without discussing it, my husband and I looked at each other and simultaneously said, “Why not?” Somehow, we both knew it was what God wanted us to do. The next day we began the scrutiny and training involved in becoming foster parents.
Over the next twelve years we fostered twelve children (not all at the same time). Some stayed for years, some stayed for only weeks, but each child taught us something different and enriched our lives immensely.
In our fostering journey we were able to grow our family through adoption. Our first foster child is now our 35-year-old daughter who has given us ten grandchildren. Our youngest daughter, aged twenty-five, was our ninth foster child. The rest of the children we loved and cared for went back to their family or were adopted by other families.
Fostering isn’t for everybody. It is a heartbreaking road at times. Each child had a tragic story—stories we could not comprehend. But each child also had a purpose. God used each one to teach us something.
Was it hard to say goodbye? Yes. Through the years the most common question we were asked was, “How can you love a child and then let them go?” We always answered, “We can’t, but God can.” Without God doing it through us, the experience could have been traumatic. But because He gave us grace to love, lose, and to love again, we were able to make a difference in their lives and they in ours.
Have you ever thought about fostering? Are you willing to open your arms, hearts, and homes to children who need the love and acceptance you have to offer?
Knowing that God will do it through you, are you willing to throw caution to the wind and ask, “Why not?”